Neverland Garage Sale

michael-jackson-ugly1Beseiged by creditors from all over the world, has been pop star Michael Jackson has decided to hold a garage sale at his fabled Neverland Ranch in California ,in order to raise cash. Soethby’s of London has been hired to post neighborhood signs and handle the sale. Some of the one-of-a-kind items that will be available for buyers include the famous bejeweled white glove, rumored to have been used in late night proctology escapades several years ago with various little people described in court transcripts as “young midgets.” Also offered, Mr. Jackson’s full size replica of the Elephant Man’s skeleton, wearing satin Speedos, as well as the pop star’s original face, stretched out  and nailed to a board like a beaver pelt. Jesus Juice will be served to the first 100 visitors to the sale and Sotheby’s has requested that potential buyers bring exact change.

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