With all the frenetic ranting and raving about the ongoing problem of illegal immigration in the US the obvious answer has been overlooked. Much has been made about the number of illegals here, estimated to be around 13 million, most of them Mexican. The prospect of somehow deporting these millions has been pretty much shelved, even by the most virulent conservatives. Not because they wouldn’t like to see it done, but because it would take too long and cost way too much money. Taxpayer anger has been directed at the illegals (as it always is during depressed economic times) as a huge drain on resources such as schools, hospitals and prisons. The immigration debate has become something of the old chestnut that “everybody talks about the weather but no one does anything about it”. Well, at last we can do something about it. The answer has been revealed and it comes from the most unlikely backwater of the debate. Governor Rick Perry of Texas unwittingly stumbled across the solution while dreaming up his plan for his state to secede from the union. While seceding is an excellent idea, it doesn’t go far enough. What is needed is for Texas to form the third leg of the new American triad. We already have Blue states and Red states, but all this has done is to divide the country into two increasingly antagonistic factions. We need another color to add to the political rainbow in this nation. We need a Brown state. We need “Mexas”.
Think about it: all illegals would be granted immediate Mexas citizenship the minute they drove through the gates of the barricaded nation state that used to be Texas. Thirteen million is not a huge number when compared to states like California or New York and there would be ample room once all the white residents had been deported to Red and Blue states. Under the Red, White and Brown Mandate, the citizens of Mexas would be issued ID cards good anywhere in the Continental US. These cards would by statute deny medical care, driver licenses, education and Fourth Amendment rights, but would allow employment outside of Mexas ,as long as the salaries earned were no more than 65% of the Federal minimum wage. This would allow US corporations access to plenty of exploitable labor while at the same time removing from the debate the argument that illegals take Americans’ jobs, since only brown skinned workers could be legally hired for such work as picking strawberries and gutting chickens at Tyson poultry plants.
Those Mexas-icans who decided they needed medical treatment or education would have to return to their new home state to get it. Taxes from the rest of America would be restricted to paying for upkeep of the barbed wire around Mexas and bus transportation for the Mexas residents to get to and from their jobs in Red and Blue America. And what of the children born of illegals , who up to now have been granted automatic citizenship? Naturally, for the new laws to work, the 14th Amendment would have to be repealed and US citizenship revoked from these folks. Sorry kids, but some minor inconveniences will have to be put up with by those who chose the wrong time and place to be born. Now, admittedly, there may be some initial confusion in sorting out the legal Brown Skins from the illegal all over America, but at this very moment Congress is working on legislation to develop a biometric identification card for all Hispanic looking citizens. Until then, the Arizona Highway Patrol has volunteered to handle the stop and question duties in determining who’s who in the zoo, based on reasonable suspicion.