“He’s up there in Washington Dee Cee, and by God he’s planning on ways to get our guns.” So began guest speaker Reverend Desmond Fullbright at the NRA Meeting of the Minds Jamboree in Sasquatch, Georgia. Held once a month since the inauguration of the 44th president, the NRA Jamboree is billed as a miasma of right wing cogitation. “You seen how on the day the liberals moved him into the White House he didn’t say nothin’ at all about guns, right? Well there you go, that’s your proof right there.” The planned agenda of the fifth Jamboree session, printed on bulls eye target sheets, listed such topics as: No Guns = No God, The Lord is MY Shepherd not Yours, Chitlins Trump Sushi, and He Already Got My Brain Now He Wants My Gun. “Everybody knows that Muslim-ism causes cancer, said Fullbright, continuing his rant, and that goddam Nigerian is bringin’ plane loads of Muslims into America on board Air Force One; he’s never denied it, so there’s your proof right there!” Numerous vendors were set up around the speaking platform and doing brisk business as Jamboree attendees dressed in overalls and war surplus military camouflage rooted among the offerings grunting approval or dismissal. The biggest seller of the day proved to be a painting on black velvet featuring Barack Obama prying a pistol from the cold dead hand of Mother Teresa with the caption, “No armed honkies allowed in Obama-Land”.
44 Wants Your .44
