Disgruntled by recent legislation aimed at reducing bonus payments for employees that brought on the world wide economic collapse, Wall Street executives are vowing to do everything in their power to take America “back to the Stone Age.” Speaking from astride the solid gold toilet on board his Gulf Stream executive jet, Bruno Kroneaur of AIG lamented that, “Americans just don’t get it. The working class exists solely to pad the bank accounts of The Worthy Ones”. Pausing to flush several gold encrusted feces down the crapper, Kroneaur went on, “when the Great Republican Depression of the 1930’s occurred, the only ones to suffer were those who had failed to hoard wheelbarrows full of cash and gold in their boathouses. They were too busy living from day to day, working menial low paying jobs to plan ahead. Who cares what happens to people like that? If they die off, so what… they breed like rabbits so there will always be plenty of them around to pay taxes for things we need like roads and police. We need roads in order to get our limousines to the airport and we need police to keep the working class from stealing food for their litters of bastard offspring.” Kroneaur gazed pensively at the clouds below and sipped some 30 year old scotch. “I think it will be good for America to return to a simpler time. Who knows, maybe in a new Stone Age we’ll be able to get a patent for fire”
Wall Street Threatens Stone Age Revenge
