Trump Claims to be Useful Idiot

On Sunday President Trump admitted that he “used the telephone machine” to speak with the newly elected leader of Ukraine, months earlier.
“I couldn’t use the Twitter, he said, “our intelligence services couldn’t confirm that President Hugh Krane has thumbs, so what would be the point?”
The president said he wanted Ukrainian proof that Biden’s son, Ben Ghazzi, had stolen a shipment of record players bound for the Soviet Union during the cold war.
“This would have changed everything,” Trump said, alluding to the effect Doris Day records would have had on the space race.
“I expose this evil conspiracy and suddenly I’m the bad guy? The Lame Stream Media make me me out to be an idiot every time I open my mouth. I don’t need their help!”

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