F-35 Wealth Fighter

Now that the cost of a single F-35 stealth fighter has dropped to $89 million, there is still hope for the Pentagon’s shuddering bucket of bolts.

With parts for the cranky, unpredictable fighter being produced in practically every state in the country, it’s a win-win jobs getter.

This in turn, guarantees reelection for whichever senator or representative brings home this particularly moldy slice of bacon to his constituents.

Pilots complain that the delicate aircraft can’t be flown at night or in areas where the sun shines, or near lightning or through fog. “You can’t make it fly too high, or too low,” said Navy test pilot Commander Ed Gusaver. “Because of the cramped cockpit, he added, “they’ve added a sign near the boarding ladder that says, “Must be THIS tall to pilot the plane.”

 Moreover, in simulated dogfights it gets defeated by the 1970’s era F-16, even if the F-16 pilot is blindfolded and has his hands tied behind his back.

“We envisioned the F-35 as a visionary replacement for the F-22, the F-16, the A-10 Thunderbolt … pretty much every fighter in our hangers all over the world.
Now, we’re leaning toward its role as being to replace the cruise missile, loaded with explosives with a hamster at the controls.”